What We Say to Ourselves Shapes How We Show Up
How we relate to a situation is usually shaped by past experience. We say something to ourselves — rarely out loud — and that internal response shapes how we listen and engage with others.
They're patterns. And they can be interrupted.
How the Cue Works
The moment you hear yourself think, "Not again" — the déjà vu, the frustration — is the signal a pattern is at play. (Usually it comes with a bit of a tone...you know the one.)
Then three steps: Notice the pattern in real time. Name it for what it is, without judgment. Next, choose a different action — even if it's small. Until you do, the loop will repeat.
What You're Building
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Shared pattern language across the team
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Permission to interrupt dynamics — for anyone, regardless of title
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Faster recovery under pressure
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Self-correcting teams, not just self-aware ones
Designed to create shifts in the room, not just understanding.
Two Ways to Work Together
1
1:1 Coaching
For leaders whose communication or collaboration has gotten stuck. We find where unnamed patterns are hiding, name them and what they're costing you, then build the reflex to shift behavior for good.
2
The Not Again Cue™ for Teams:
From Self-Aware to Self-Correcting
A facilitated working session, not a presentation. Teams work with real scenarios (not hypotheticals), see their own patterns reflected back clearly, practice shifting how they respond in real time, and leave with shared language they can actually use.